advocacy: (☮ something's changed for the better)
Dᴀɴᴇᴄᴀ Wᴀssᴇʀᴍᴀɴ ([personal profile] advocacy) wrote2013-11-01 09:37 pm

❥ 002 spam/voice

spam - scott.
[Daneca sits in her room for a while, repeatedly closing her eyes. She keeps hoping that every time she does, the thoughts and memories swirling around in her head will stop and every time she opens them again, she hopes they just completely blip out of existence.]

[But unfortunately, what she's thinking and feeling can't be so easily wished away.]

[On the one hand, she can still feel those distant pangs for Barron. The butterflies she felt in his presence mixed with that sense of calm and security where she no longer had to fear what she was sits firmly in the back of her mind. On top of that, she can still feel the loss. The grief she felt--that other Daneca on that other Barge--is so much deeper than what she felt when she found out the truth of what he did to Cassel. She also feels guilt over feeling any of that, over feeling the way she does about Sam, even about Cassel.]

[But even worse is knowing what she did to Scott.]

[She doesn't know how he's handling the idea of her being an emotion worker. Maybe he's as angry as Sam was when he found out she was without hearing it from her directly. Maybe he's furious about her working him at all. Daneca wouldn't blame him if he were; he would be if the situation were reversed. She doesn't go to Scott out of fear of his potential anger though. She's more concerned that he may still be worked or confused.]

[She's also aware that her secret wasn't the only one put out there for people to figure out or learn.]

[She knocks on his door and waits anxiously outside.]


voice.
So that was a flood, right? I read about them over the network, but I never expected it to be... [Her voice fades a little.] ...Like that.

This might seem like a really stupid question, but how do most of you recover from something like that?
patheticvillain: (ʭ hit 'em right between the eyes)

spam

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 10:06 pm (UTC)(link)
If he does what Sam did he's a hypocrite and an asshole. [Utterly flat.] He was terrified of anyone finding out about him. But I don't think he will. He's a better person than that.

[At which he sucks his teeth a little because how do you even be a good person? He doesn't know.]
patheticvillain: (ʭ & now you steal away)

private;

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 10:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Well. Yeah.

And I'm all about self-preservation.
patheticvillain: (ʭ a dark but common horse)

spam

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[Even though he knows what his answer is now, he takes a while to respond, just because he doesn't know what he would have said before. They're equally important, he thinks, both answers, because Daneca doesn't quite know who he is now, even if she's seen it. She never wanted to accept what he was then, either.]

[Eventually, he shakes his head.]


No. He wasn't. When it happened, I don't really know what I thought but it was all tangled up with - with my mom and with Lila and everything. Which isn't fair. That's what people want to think about emotion workers because it's easy. And for me it was - really, really easy.

But you're so far away from being like my mom you're on another planet. Sam was wrong.
patheticvillain: (ʭ & as you step back into line)

private;

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Nobody here who needs it as much.
patheticvillain: (ʭ am i waiting for godot?)

private;

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 11:33 pm (UTC)(link)
See? It's still me.

[Basically useless and pretty pathetic.]
patheticvillain: (ʭ another clever word)

private;

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-02 11:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[He just. Sort of grins at her, not sure what to say to that. And cuts the feed.]
patheticvillain: (ʭ lost all that you could)

spam

[personal profile] patheticvillain 2013-11-03 12:05 am (UTC)(link)
[It'll upset Sam. But doing the right thing is often pretty fucking upsetting. He hurt Lila intensely when he decided to stay here, not to mention all the people he didn't get to say goodbye to in person, but he still knows that's the right thing. If this is Daneca's right thing, then whatever. Sam'll recover.]

[Besides which, not his business. He got in between them before, in between Daneca and what she wanted specifically, and he sure as hell isn't making that mistake again.]


Nah. You can't make yourself love somebody, you can't stop yourself from loving somebody. You can't . . . make yourself be with somebody you don't love just because it'd make it easier on them. That's no way to live.

You gotta do what's right for you, not - anybody else. Not me or Sam or your mom or whoever.

[That's why he won't tell her she shouldn't make the deal she's made. If it's right for her - then it's right for her. That's just how it is.]
lastrat: (a chance to find)

spam.

[personal profile] lastrat 2013-11-03 12:20 am (UTC)(link)
[He exhales through his nose, feels it rumble in the back of his throat.]

What did I say?
lastrat: (in the living daylights)

spam.

[personal profile] lastrat 2013-11-03 01:44 am (UTC)(link)
One that didn't need asking.
secretasshole: (what about alien diseases?)

[personal profile] secretasshole 2013-11-03 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
Because I have a much more limited capacity to feel than my human counterparts.

[And he will just quietly (and sort of unfairly) resent that you assumed he wasn't trying to help when he actually was. Progress is difficult. B(]
secretasshole: (think of all the things we learned)

[personal profile] secretasshole 2013-11-03 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
No. I am a robot.
secretasshole: (there is research to be done)

[personal profile] secretasshole 2013-11-03 03:45 am (UTC)(link)
You don't have to apologize.
secretasshole: (pray to your god.)

[personal profile] secretasshole 2013-11-03 03:53 am (UTC)(link)
I do. Quite often, actually, but not about people admitting they're new to the Barge and have never communicated with a robot before.

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