[He can't hold her gaze. When he looks down and away, it's probably the strongest tell she's ever seen. It's not that he doesn't want to lie to her - with his face, his words, his body - it's that he's forcing himself not to fall back into the habit. And it's a lot fucking harder than he expected with her. What it comes down to isn't even self-loathing, although he still has plenty of that. It's shame. He did a lot of shit that wasn't right, to her and around her. He wants to curl up and go away.]
[But that's cowardly, and sometimes he can manage not to be a coward.]
[He squares his shoulders and does not ask her why would you want that, even though, with what she's seen of him, he honestly doesn't understand.]
I guess I didn't. But, I mean. That's what I want too.
spam
[But that's cowardly, and sometimes he can manage not to be a coward.]
[He squares his shoulders and does not ask her why would you want that, even though, with what she's seen of him, he honestly doesn't understand.]
I guess I didn't. But, I mean. That's what I want too.