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[Daneca has spent the first few hours going through the posts to the network. She...]
[...doesn't know how to feel about any of this so far. People going missing and others turning up dead. Zombies, vampires. And Cassel. Realistically speaking, Daneca knows she should probably be more anxious over a potential serial killer running around than the prospect of speaking to Cassel again, but that's what gives her more pause than anything. (At least she's not totally surprised by the idea of a serial killer on the Barge, she figures. Still in the realm of sanity for now.) She thinks maybe she should send him a private message or try to find him and speak one-on-one, in private. But that seems like too much even for her right now.]
[So, she settles for just introducing herself to everyone else. If he wants to talk to her, he can. If not...]
[Well, he doesn't have to. It's not like Cassel owes her anything anyway.]
[With that resolved, she can go back to being properly more anxious about people turning up dead, zombies, and vampires. And apparently also werewolves being real as well.]
[Daneca appears a little stiff and tense. Being on camera and broadcasting like this makes her a little nervous in ways that are harder to cover up than other things that make her nervous or uncomfortable. But it doesn't paralyze her or make her smile seem like a disingenous cover for nerves that ends up looking more scary than pleasant. Daneca is not someone who can lie very well. It's nervous and small, but her smile is no less sincere. She's trying desperately to channel her mother right now.]
I know I'm coming in at a really bad time, but I thought I should probably introduce myself anyway. My name is Daneca and I'm new. [She flushes a little and says a little softer:] Obviously.
[She shifts a little uncomfortably and finds the strength in her voice again.]
I'm a warden for anyone that might matter to.
[She's sure it does especially to some of the inmates. She'll lie about other parts about herself anyway. Might as well be honest about some things that might make people uncomfortable.]
Anyway, I guess I'm just looking for a tour. Or advice. Whatever anybody can spare.
[...doesn't know how to feel about any of this so far. People going missing and others turning up dead. Zombies, vampires. And Cassel. Realistically speaking, Daneca knows she should probably be more anxious over a potential serial killer running around than the prospect of speaking to Cassel again, but that's what gives her more pause than anything. (At least she's not totally surprised by the idea of a serial killer on the Barge, she figures. Still in the realm of sanity for now.) She thinks maybe she should send him a private message or try to find him and speak one-on-one, in private. But that seems like too much even for her right now.]
[So, she settles for just introducing herself to everyone else. If he wants to talk to her, he can. If not...]
[Well, he doesn't have to. It's not like Cassel owes her anything anyway.]
[With that resolved, she can go back to being properly more anxious about people turning up dead, zombies, and vampires. And apparently also werewolves being real as well.]
[Daneca appears a little stiff and tense. Being on camera and broadcasting like this makes her a little nervous in ways that are harder to cover up than other things that make her nervous or uncomfortable. But it doesn't paralyze her or make her smile seem like a disingenous cover for nerves that ends up looking more scary than pleasant. Daneca is not someone who can lie very well. It's nervous and small, but her smile is no less sincere. She's trying desperately to channel her mother right now.]
I know I'm coming in at a really bad time, but I thought I should probably introduce myself anyway. My name is Daneca and I'm new. [She flushes a little and says a little softer:] Obviously.
[She shifts a little uncomfortably and finds the strength in her voice again.]
I'm a warden for anyone that might matter to.
[She's sure it does especially to some of the inmates. She'll lie about other parts about herself anyway. Might as well be honest about some things that might make people uncomfortable.]
Anyway, I guess I'm just looking for a tour. Or advice. Whatever anybody can spare.
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[She can tell he's been here a while though. He looks older. Different, somehow. She wouldn't say necessarily wiser, but definitely more experienced.]
[Either way, some of the ire is taken out of her sails and she deflates a little in both a sad and relieved way. Daneca didn't even know you could feel both sad and relieved at the same time while still feeling a little bit angry. It's a weird place to me, but she accepts it for what it is. Her gaze drops momentarily before she brings it back up to Cassel.]
It's probably a stupid question, but how have you been?
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Varying. [He hesitates.] Better lately, until all of this, I.
You? [Why are you here, he wants to know, is it what I think it is, please don't let it be.]
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[She says a little too fast to be just polite habit and in that tone of voice that's simultaneously saying No, really. and Please don't ask about it. I don't want to talk about it.]
[It's not that Daneca has been absolutely and utterly miserable complete with a lack of happiness. But it hasn't been as great as she'd necessarily like it to be. Happy still feels a little hollow sometimes with her that she tries to blame on normal growing pains.]
[She rubs at the back of her neck a little.]
Not to dig anything up, but I looked over a few weeks back. Not just this week.
I know you probably don't want to talk about it--[To her? In general? Probably both.]--I just...
[She wants to say she's sorry. But she doesn't want him to think she's being insincere or throwing him a pity party either. So she stops talking and shakes her head a little.]
I just want you to know that if you want to talk about it, you can. But you don't have to. And I guess, just to let you know that I know about it.
[Because it seems wrong to pretend like she doesn't.]
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[Well, it was stupid not to expect that. It's Daneca, she's thorough, she's approximately twenty times smarter than he is, and she's clearly not happy to see him. So she would have done her research.]
[He doesn't want to talk about it, he guesses, but less so than before, so. He frowns slightly, not quite able to look at her dead on as he thinks about how to handle this. He shouldn't expect anything from her; he knows he doesn't deserve it.]
I - look. I'm . . . catsitting right now. [Don't. Say. Anything.] One of the people who went missing - whatever, just. I'm in my cabin. Level 7, cabin 9, if you want to stop by when you're done with your tour.
. . . And thanks. For letting me know.
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[That's what's responsible for the flicker of sadness that crosses over Daneca's face before she realizes fast enough to stop. It's not hollow pity. She does truly sympathize with Cassel over what they made him do, what they did to him. There's also a little guilt and shame as well though because she didn't believe him at first. She tries not to feel it - Cassel habitually lies; it's a boy who cried wolf situation when you get down to it - but it's not as simple as that. Daneca can't help but think there should have been some way she should have known he was being truthful that time.]
Oh. Um, yeah. Sure.
[She nods.]
I'll see you then.
[And she cuts the feed.]
[Frankly, she wouldn't consider it at all right now. Just talking to him over the communicators is awkward and weird enough. But Daneca thinks they should probably talk in private and in person.]
[She doesn't go right after the tour though. She waits a little while, working up the nerve to go and knock on his door. But she does.]
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[It's Cassel's goal, now, to hold his face and spin his words so that she knows exactly when he's lying. That's the least he can do. The very least.]
[When the knock comes, he sighs and puts Mel down on the bed beside Ilia, leaving them to trade suspicious looks as he crosses the room and pulls the door open. He smiles at Daneca when he sees her, wan and uncertain, but steps aside to let her pass.]
[Sam's bed is made, but has clearly been slept in, because Cassel's never been great at making a bed. Zane spends less time in here, but sometimes one or the other of them needs the company. It would be awkward to explain, so Cassel just doesn't.]
[He situates himself cross-legged on his bed and gestures to the desk chair.]
Make yourself at home.
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[She doesn't ask about the bed and sits down in the chair, sitting practically on the edge of it. Daneca can't force herself to just relax right away. She looks around the room even though there's nothing of importance or surprise in it, but it's easier than looking at Cassel or the felines.]
I think everyone's already starting to know me as that chick Cassel knows from home. [A beat.] You've got a lot of friends here.
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Yeah, sorry about that. I'm just loud. Anyway, Two-Face isn't my friend.
[It's sort of a joke and sort of not. He still doesn't fully comprehend that people know him and claim him as theirs.]
[Ilia turns his icy stare to regard Daneca severely. Mel, on the other hand, curls up into a ball next to Cassel, who lays his hand on his back.]
This - the little one, Melchior, is the Emperor's. That's, uh, that's really his name. He's - we don't know where he is right now.
[Cassel chews the inside of his cheek and then just gives up and says it.]
He's probably dead.
Daneca, it's all fucked up right now. The people who're getting hurt, I mean, some of them aren't even human, they know how to take care of themselves. If it comes down to it, can you -
[He fiddles with the wrists of his gloves. Don't say can you take care of yourself.]
Just don't hesitate.
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[She's always known that Cassel has cared on some mysterious level or another. But it wasn't enough to stay. It wasn't enough to be there in the long-run. And she doesn't want to get that invested in him as a friend again because she knows where that leads.]
[Finally, she looks back up at him.]
Cassel, look, I appreciate the concern--I do. [She shakes her head a little.] But you don't have to worry about me.
You don't owe me anything, okay? And I don't expect things to be any different than where they were left back home. The only I ask is that you don't...
[And right away the guilt goes into Daneca's eyes and she's looking at the floor fast. Or rather, her eyes are on her hands in her lap. But she's trying to make it look like she's staring at the floor instead. It takes her a minute to find the nerve to look back at him again.]
Please don't tell anyone. I know you don't understand that, but...
[She moves her mouth to say the next word, but it leaves her and she purses her lips instead for a second.]
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Daneca. If I didn't understand it, I wouldn't have told you to come here instead of just asking you on the network.
[It was months and months before he said anything about his own work. Admittedly, it's different, but still: he understands the appeal of secrecy.]
I'm not gonna say shit. As far as I'm concerned, you're just somebody I knew once. Not a worker. If you want me to correct people who assume we're friends, I can do that, too. I was gone for six months before I died, you don't owe me anything, either.
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[She knows he will keep his word about not outing her to people though and tries to focus on that.]
Thanks.
You don't have to though, you know. Correct people, I mean. I don't know who Cassel Sharpe is to people around here, but I know who you are to me. And we were at least friends once.
[It's one of those situations where friendship is the best label, but it's not 100% accurate either. Either way, he tried to protect her once. That meant something. A lot of something.]
[Now she's not sure where it falls. That's something they're both going to have to find out.]
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[He sighs.]
You were my friend. I didn't know how to have friends then. I'm a little better at it now.
[A little.]
Look, you asked for advice earlier. I actually can give that, if you want it. We can just pretend that we've never met before, and I can give you Barge advice, and we can figure out the rest of it later.
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[She says it sincerely, keeping her eyes on his. Regardless of him leaving, Daneca does not immediately assume the worst of him or think there is nothing worthwhile there for her or for anyone else. It would be nice to have someone at her back in this incredibly strange and different place. But especially someone like Cassel whether he sees it or realizes it himself.]
You know that, right?
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[But that's cowardly, and sometimes he can manage not to be a coward.]
[He squares his shoulders and does not ask her why would you want that, even though, with what she's seen of him, he honestly doesn't understand.]
I guess I didn't. But, I mean. That's what I want too.
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[She expected instead for him to look straight at her and, without even batting an eye, tell her whatever he wanted to hear like it was the gospel truth.]
Then we'll get there.
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[And here's something else completely alien: Cassel looks at her, but his expression is shy, uncertain. He doesn't want to do wrong. He doesn't want to do anything wrong. He doesn't want to treat her with too much care. He just doesn't want to mess up.]
Cool.
I meant it about - if you have any questions. I've been here nine months, I know some shit.
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I guess I just kinda wanna know some of the highlights of the place. Aside from zombies and vampires and werewolves.
[Just don't talk about Death Bingo, Cassel. Don't.]
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It's a good place. [A beat.] I know it doesn't seem like that, but there are really good people here with all the crazy awful shit. And nobody has any preconceived notions about -
[He spreads his hands, gloved palms up.]
Nobody gets it. Of course, that also means that nobody gets it, and - [He makes a face. Naked hands everywhere.]
Anyway. Sometimes ports are awesome, too, we went to LA once.
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[She's still keeping the gloves on though regardless. She's not feeling that liberated here.]
Well now I regret not getting here sooner. I always wanted to experiment with becoming a beach bum.
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Oh, the CES is awesome too. It gives you all kinds of places. Did Lark show you?
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[Insane. Incredible. Hard to believe actually possible. Exactly like something out of a TV show or movie. The coolest thing she's ever seen.]
[She blushes a little at how speechless it makes her and shakes her head.]
You'd think being on a ship flying around in space, I'd probably be more prepared. But I wasn't expecting anything like that. It was cool.
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[It does not matter that they're kind of having a moment, Cassel will still complain.]
That's what always gets people the first day. The deck and the CES. They're the only reason people don't go crazy here more often. It's like you get to be free for a couple of minutes, even if technically you're not.
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[Daneca doesn't need to ask if Cassel was an inmate or not and she doesn't need to ask if he felt like he was ever trapped her. Cassel felt trapped back home and he had way more freedom there than he ever would have here.]
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[A firm, instant answer. He loves it there. His best memories are there. It's a place that feels like it loves him, although really, it's just a place he's been shown love.]
[He hangs onto that silence and his smile for a little too long, and feels awkward again, rubbing the back of his neck.]
I mean, sometimes it tosses out duds, but it's always changing. It's good.
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You're happy here, [she notes with a softer smile.]
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